Category Archives: Questioning Gender and Gender Dysphoria

Transgender people aren’t having a hard time because they are transgender; they are having a hard time because society has decided that being transgender is a bad thing.  People have drawn a conclusion in order to organize their own world and transgender people are caught in that crossfire.  People bought into this negative view butContinue reading “Broken, We are Not”

How is it that I can feel this nagging sense of discontent when I have everything?  I have a good job that pays well, a healthy relationship, a reliable car, a cute house, people that love me.  I travel and do the things I want to do.  Could it be that having everything can makeContinue reading “The Boy Underneath”

There is no right or wrong way to be transgender nor must you fit into a binary. There is no one way to be trans and no such thing as being “not trans enough”.  Gender is not binary; it is on a spectrum.  We have been led to believe that gender consists of a ridgedContinue reading “A Million Ways to be Trans”

From the moment we enter kindergarten, we learn that life is an evaluation.  We validate and confirm who we are based on how others define us- funniest, smartest, most likely to be successful, perfect attendance, most likable, most talented.  We enter coloring contests before we can even color inside the lines then learn that chaotic,Continue reading “Being Enough”

“These pains you feel are messengers, listen to them.” -Rumi No doubt my body has changed but testosterone will never completely eradicate my insecurities nor will it give anybody the ideal, perfect male physique.  Testosterone will never narrow my wide hips that developed during puberty.  Fat redistribution was more subtle than I envisioned prior toContinue reading “How Manly is Man Enough?”

Transitioning in the midst of a decade long photography project, presents an opportunity to see how differently people relate to me as a man vs. a woman. Enjoying a day off, I decided to swing by the Weirdest little Church in Texas, check out their volunteer program and hopefully capture a few shots on camera.Continue reading “The Cost of Being Gendered as Male”

Understanding Systemic Racism What a tragic week of murder and chaos this has been after months of coronavirus fear and quarantine.  It’s all been weighing on me – the sadness, not knowing what to do or how to feel but also, not attending the protests.  I made the decision early on to sit out theContinue reading “My White Privilege”

I see the woman in you and this is what I learned from her. Thank you, Beautiful Woman. I stumbled upon the goodbye letter of another writer a week ago which made excruciatingly clear, an all too common reality for transgender people – suicide.  Pieces of the six-page letter are written below (her blog wasContinue reading “Suicide With a Cat’s Perspective”

Thoughts on Being Transgender From a More Spiritual Perspective I admit, I’ve had trouble writing lately.  More specifically, I’ve had trouble writing about the material world, the physical body and matters of the ego.  I’ve been on a more spiritual journey for a while now – getting into yoga, meditation, ecstatic dance, astrology and gettingContinue reading “All the Answers Inside”

Take a Walk in Someone Else’s Shoes For years I’ve intermittently worked on a personal photography project of homeless people.  I’ve always had a soft spot in my heart for the downtrodden and being transgender, I realize we have a lot in common which gives me a sense of solidarity.  People don’t understand us.  WeContinue reading “What Does it Mean to Live a Good Life?”

Contemplating the nuances of what is means to be a man Today was one of the best days of my life; I played pick up soccer with the guys, AS a guy.  “Hey dude”, “hey man”, “he”, they all said.  They saw me as one of them, as one of the guys.  It was theContinue reading “The Overrated Idea of Being “Man Enough””

I want my body to change so bad that my soul hurts.  Screaming inside, I feel helpless, inside this body that is my cage.  Stranded at a loss; I can’t move. I don’t want to talk.  All I can do is exist – an existence that seems like it is not mine to be hadContinue reading “My Body, The Cage”

Cramming my Gender Journey into a Nutshell Follow my journey and continue to read my posts to discover how the answer became clear.  Forthcoming blog posts may be fragmented, confusing, surprising, and empowering but that rollercoaster is exactly what transition is like. People usually think of “coming out” as an external thing – having toContinue reading “Am I Transgender?”